March 26th

Today in one of my classes my students had to act out a dialogue they had written which entailed one of them being a patient going to the doctor to get medical advice. They had to use 15 of the vocabulary words we had gone over in the two previous classes. Two of them used the examples I had given them in class. After this, which was hilarious, they had a mini-test where I was the patient and they were the doctor. I came up with a random illness and they had to figure out what was wrong with me and then cure me. The last two students were ridiculous enough for me to share!

The first ridiculous guy: Ben
English level: sub-par but he’s hilarious
Illness: constipation


Me: Hey Doctor Ben
Ben: hello, pretty girl
Class: hilariously laughing
Me: Okay Okay… Go Ben
Ben: Are you the doctor or me (he’s the twentieth student to go, all have been the doctor aka.. not paying attention)
Me: You’re the doctor, Mr. I’m texting in class
Ben: Oh, umm.. what’s wrong with you
Me: Well, it’s embarrassing I have really bad constipation
Ben: How long?
Me: Three days
Ben: well, um, uhhhhhh, maybe it’s because your so hot
Class: Laughing again
Ben: (embarrassed) I mean, well, you need an injection and rest
Me to the class: So, if I go to Dr. Ben, I’m going to die

Next Student: Simon
English level: pretty dang good!
Illness: diarrhea

Simon: What’s up
Me: What’s up Dr. Simon
Simon: What’s up….
Me: (I say nothing and just stare at him)
Simon: What are your symptoms
Me: Well, I went to Dr. Ben yesterday with constipation, he gave me an injection, and now I have terrible diarrhea.
Simon: Well, do you want to be healed quickly or slowly
Me: Um, quickly!
Simon: Alright, listen to me. You are going to have an operation. We’re going to operate, it will cost $50,000. We all know that operations are dangerous so we will keep you in our nice facilities to make sure that you are comfortable, which will cost more. But, don’t ask questions cause I’m the doctor and I know what I’m doing. So, what do you think?
Me: I’m going back to Dr. Ben

I’m also writing this in my next class who is writing a massive amount of vocabulary that I have given them while we listen to Toni Braxton’s ‘Unbreak my heart’ for English listening….. or because their teacher would rather have music going instead of silence. No, it’s for English listening.